February 2012: What Did I Learn?

Lately, I've been big on writing lists. But not lists of goals. Something about goals can be overwhelming when life is changing so rapidly -- and I'm at the time in my life where things are changing constantly. Lately, I've been writing lists of what I've learned -- and then writing goals from that. Here's what I learned this month.

1. The most devastating event can be the best thing that ever happened. Can I point out something weird? That's my thumb. That's my thumb two days before I cut the tip off. It's weird to look at now. At the time, injuring myself at work was a horrible thing -- I was devastated that I had this injury to take care of, that I couldn't use my thumb, that I was constantly having to explain why I had a huge bandage on my thumb. I hated not being able to wash dishes, or cook very well, or use my thumb to type on my iPhone. But as devastating and as painful as it was, what did it lead to? I quit a job I hated and within four days, got a job that I really enjoy. How's that for turn around?

2. I really missed being able to practice my hobbies. I really fell off the photography bandwagon for a few months. Partly because I was miserable and depressed, but also because I didn't make time for them.

3. I am good enough. But I don't have to be good all the time. After months of waiting, of wondering, of looking for validation and reassurance that I was good, that I was capable and able to do what I want to do, that I was good enough for someone to see it in me, I finally realized the truth: I am. I am good enough. But that's not the point. It's not about being good enough. It's about showing it. And I don't have to be perfect all the time. We all make mistakes. We all fall down. We all fail. After six months of feeling like a failure for not being "good," I realize that it never mattered in the first place. I only failed by letting myself think I wasn't good enough.

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xo Michelle

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