2.19.2013

Rainbow Dots

Dress, Macy's (came with belt) 
Cardigan, Forever 21
Kitten heels, Kohl's

Way back in November, I bought this dress while waiting to meet a friend for a (very) late dinner. It was on the clearance rack in the juniors department in Macy's. I thought it was $10. When I got to the register, it was $5, and so I felt even less guilt about buying it. I love this dress because it's very easy to layer for winter wear -- I can pair it with a multitude of different colored tights, all of my blazers, and most of my cardigans, as well as a lot of my button up tops and various camisoles -- but it's also going to be really good for spring too. It's brightly colored, breezy, and wears really well by itself. 

It's been really mild for the last few days here -- raining off and on occasionally. For a while, it's been very cold and dry which is abnormal for Oregon and very hard for me to dress for! However, Sunday it was nice enough to have bare legs and only a cardigan on top!




Danny took these pictures for me. (He did a really great job! Better than I do with a tripod!) He also took some for me Saturday which sent me into a crying spell. There are days where I really, really think I'm okay and I've gained back a lot of the confidence I lost working at a job that made me feel horrible, but then I'll see a picture of myself or I'll try to put on shorts or something and I'll be right back there again. 

I'm still not where I want to be body-wise, but I'm trying to change my perspective from one that is inherently disordered to something healthier. It doesn't happen overnight or even in a year. I've spent 24 years being in a body and having a very disordered relationship with food, my appearance, and exercise and that won't stop overnight, even if I feel okay for a few days. It's something I have to work on everyday. It's a very strange tightrope to walk -- that space between wanting to lose weight to feel comfortable, but also trying to accept my body for what it is and not have such a strange/stupid relationship with food. 

Long story short, being a lady-person is sometimes hard. 




One last note about my hair: I'm still learning how to style it again! I really despised my long hair -- I kept it in a ponytail 95% of the time. I thought I'd go back to short hair so easily and quickly, but it feels like getting it cut for the first time all over again! I forgot how to tame the cowlicks on the back of my head! I'm still struggling with my bangs! But I love it. I feel so much better than I did and it's so much easier to get ready for work now. No more rushing to get my hair washed, conditioned, dried, and styled before I moved on to make up, picking out an outfit, etc. Now I'm pretty much ready right out of the shower. Can I tell you how freeing that is? 


I've mentioned this before, but I still get really sad at the end of the weekend! Monday and Tuesday are the hardest days for me to get through. I don't get as upset about it as I used to, but I really miss having unlimited free time to indulge my hobbies. At the same time, however, it's kind of nice to feel like I'm actually working at something and for people who are doing something incredibly good for my community. It's really rewarding, even if I'm not directly responsible! I hope you've had a good Monday and Tuesday though! 


3 comments:

Thank you for reading my blog! :]
xo Michelle

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